Over my years of study of the human population, I have observed certain behaviors that show much more about a person than their dreams. And who wants to hear another Freudian analysis anyway? These are everyday things you can watch for…and determine what kind of personality the people around you really have.
Never stays in the allotted space when filling out a document, writes on whatever line is convenient and leaves it to the next person to figure out what they mean. Argh, this kind of person drives me nuts. Do I work with one, you say? Uh…I hope she doesn’t read this blog post.
Which bathroom stall you use (closest or furthest)–either you’re lazy or in a hurry, or you’re really shy, one of those people who can’t pee if people are around, as if trying to hide the fact that you have all the same bodily functions we all do. Everybody pees. Get over it.
Men who use a stall instead of a urinal–do I really need to say why they would do that? (This is supposed to be a family-friendly blog.)
People who write on everything–like a dog marking its territory. Why do people feel the need to write on my hand? Numbers and swirls and flowers… It’s called paper–ever hear of it?
Where you sit in a classroom–either you’re a nerd, blind, and deaf–or you’re a trouble maker. But I wonder about the people who sit in the middle… Are they people who are really trouble but are trying to pretend they’re not? Or are they nerds pretending? Maybe they’re some kind of crossover, people who do their homework and pay attention to the teacher, and then make horrible dirty jokes at lunch, you know, the kind that are told with such a straight face it takes a few seconds for people to realize it was a joke. (Yeah, I always sit in the middle.)
People who wear their bluetooth headset even when they’re not talking to someone–as if they’re about to receive a life and death call at any moment! Really? Put the freaking thing away. (And let’s not talk about the people who walk around stores talking on their headsets, looking like they’re conversing with themselves. They remind me of people in mental institutions talking to the leprechaun on their shoulder.)
People who circle the parking lot looking for just the right space, when they could have taken the first space they saw and been in the store ten minutes ago. Maybe they just really don’t want to walk, or maybe it’s a pride thing, you know, who got the closest space, who got the hot girl, who has the biggest… I don’t know what you people are thinking–I was totally thinking engine size. (family-friendly, remember?)
The way people wear their hair. No, I think I’ll save this one for later. It deserves it’s own post.